Allowing Myself

…to feel, to love, to be.

Tag: music

Futures x10 x2

On November 2nd we went to see the closing show of the Jimmy Eat World’s Futures x10 tour at Club Nokia in Los Angeles. This is the same venue we saw them play Clarity x10, though for that show we had seats in the balcony. This time, we were committed to GA floor – and it was awesome.

We saw the opening show of the Futures x10 tour exactly one month before – if you remember, this is when I saw the band on the street and almost threw up from panic. It was really great to see them play the opening and closing shows of the same tour, especially since this involved the first 13 songs of the set list being the same. I could tell they’d gotten into a groove over the month-long tour. The songs, the time in between songs and the whole band just hummed.

This show, we were in Joshua Tree the day before and the morning of, so I knew we didn’t have the energy to do anything but stand and watch the set. Even in my exhausted state, knowing I had to travel to Boston the next day, I still loved every minute.

During the sound-check, the tech came out with a gorgeous blue bass on. “The bass player’s bass is so blue,” I said to H. “Yeah, that’s the one he always plays,” H said. “Oh – I never noticed before,” I replied.

It got me thinking – I’ve seen this band live almost 10 times, they’re my favorite, hands down, and I’ve never really watched the BAND play. I’m so fixated on Jim Adkins that the rest of the band blurs into the background.

Whoops.

A few weeks ago, my friend Joanna got to meet Jim Adkins after the show in Virginia. She made sure to take a selfie with him to send me. She said he is the nicest guy ever and that they really do just hang around the venue after the show, getting dinner and talking to fans.

Again, with the Jtree trip and the flight to Boston the next day, I knew we couldn’t hang around to meet them – but I feel like we’re getting closer. One day we’ll hit up a show and make time and get to meet them. For sure. In the meantime, I’ll wait patiently for their next album and tour.

Bonus – the band takes a pic of the audience each night and we made the cut. You can see H’s hands as the highest ones on the bottom left side of the pic below – he’s wearing a black t-shirt. I’m somewhere to the right of him and our friend is also standing there with us.

So it was a low key concert for us but totally worth the experience. Seeing the band 2x in one month did nothing but turn up the volume on my love for them. :sigh:

Check out the set list from the show. I was thrilled they played Dizzy (my other favorite besides Polaris and 23) and Jim talked a bunch during this show. He said he appreciates people still coming out to see their shows. It’s the “hugest compliment”.

I’m lucky I live in LA – a city they play in often. Their songs have impacted so much of the past 10 years of my life. Thank you to them for keeping on.

Advertisements

Piqued

Los Angeles’ best small venues to catch music in.

Jill on trusting in basic goodness:

I am already whole, all of us are — this is basic goodness. I am not a problem to be fixed, or a project to take on, and neither are you, nor anyone else. You are not — no matter what advertising, religion, culture, or that little meanie with sharp teeth that lives in the dark might say – you are not basically bad, you are not unworthy or unlovable.

Lindsey on Parenting as an introvert / Parenting as an extrovert – knowing that my introversion affected the dynamic within my nuclear family growing up, and is something I navigate often within my relationship with my sister now as adults, I am keenly aware this will continue to be part of who I am as a mother:

My introversion and natural shyness surely means many things for my children, good and bad. I worry that the bad outweighs the good, that my lack of outgoingness and my struggle to include other people in our life sacrifices something important for them. All I can do, though, is be the best version of who I know I am. All I can do is swear that I will keep trying to open up—myself, our home, and our family.

The Barefoot Contessa is every piece of Long Island I wish my life could be, wrapped in a clean and calm cooking show. So naturally, I found this drinking game to be hilarious.

Ani Difranco is one of my creative heroes. Reading this interview was like sinking back into my 15 year old self, except that now Difranco is speaking about babies on top of feminism and songwriting. We’ve both come a long way.

Difranco talking about her new album “Allergic To Water” :

Yeah, I mean that sounds like a cool way of interpreting it. I guess my particular way would be that everything that is worthwhile and in fact necessary, what sustains you and gives you life, is also painful. And often the most important things are the most painful. I think the reason I chose that song to title the whole record is because that feeling, I noticed, comes up a lot in the record. It was just that kind of year for me, or couple years.

A tad late, but I am becoming more and more a person who wants to have a spiritual Halloween (or New Years or Valentine’s Day) and be much less about drinking beers in bars. Reading more of thenuminous.net may be the right way in.

My obsession with Jimmy Eat World continues (saw them perform again last week, blog post coming). And if you have an obsession, the Internet is right there with you, helping you along. This candid interview with Jim Adkins is delightful, minus Matt Pinfield’s aggressive chatter.

Piqued

 

It was a quiet week – always grateful for that. I slept really well despite intense dreams, the cooler temps and darker mornings made for sleeping in some. We ate dinners at home, made it to the climbing gym and I got a haircut.

I feel like I did a really good job resting up before an overnight camping trip this weekend, 2nd Jimmy Eat World show in a month on Sunday plus traveling for work this coming week. I’m learning that I don’t just need recovery time after highly intense situations but I can build in “topping off” time to make sure my reserves are at their fullest before going into intense or tiring situations.

And now, a few links…

Kyla Roma is just a gem on her site. This post How I Live (Mostly Happily!) with Depression & Generalized Anxiety Disorder is not only an eye-opener about her experience, but also has a ton of links to resources and apps (!!). She writes “I had no idea how much of what I experienced daily wasn’t normal (and was optional!)” She makes the point that we only know the world as we know it, and if we’ve always felt a certain way, how can we know that that way is normal? More importantly, depression can make you forget you ever felt otherwise and obliterate you in its passing. It’s a good read.

“The process of making these books is good for you to help you process each season, appreciate it, and remember the details while also creating something to look back on in the future.” You may not know how much I love the idea of scrapbooking, but this list 10 Reasons To Give Scrapbooking A Chance hits on all the points of why I do. I just want to do it more and more. Journaling, blogging, photographing and scrapbooking. Tell all the stories!

I am continuing to learn more and more about introversion and being highly sensitive. I am not sure this applies to me for business meetings When Introverts Should Avoid Coffee, but in general, I am very sensitive to caffeine. Last weekend I had a mocha and was so wired I couldn’t think straight. Overall, I’ve switched back to tea, sip one latte a week (more for the comfort than caffeine) and avoid straight coffee entirely. Decaf doesn’t seem to matter, but the quality of the coffee does.

I linked to Elise’s blog before. Most recently she blogged her business story (you can read the entire thing here). In the last post, she spoke about her newest product idea, the BIG IDEA, the Get To Work Book. Crazy thing is, it isn’t even in production yet, and she won’t launch till July 2015. Being a paper / planner / Type-A / listmaker I am excited for the product, but more so, I am sooooo pumped she is sharing the process and behind-the-scenes of launching this product. #celebrationemoji

Years ago I wrote about stillness, and how I realized that it was never going to arrive, but instead be something I needed to actively seek amidst the activity of my full life. I think all the time – daily, at least – of TS’s Eliot’s lines from Four Quartets, We must be still and still moving. Being still in the middle of the busy-ness, that’s the goal, at least for me.  Finding ways to breathe and to be here, mostly because without doing that I miss my life.  And as I remind myself, over and over again, I chose this, this manifold set of responsibilities and identities which unfurl, shimmering, piling upon each other, beautiful and daunting at the same time.

The Slipstream of Life. Lindsey continues to break my heart and take my breath away.

Don’t forget to set your clock to “fall back” at 2am Sunday! Bye daylight savings time.

For the Halloween spirit, every year, Cathy Zielske wears a bee costume, and recently posts a video of her dancing as said bee. While the video is funny, the fact that she wears the same costume every year for 24 years is what tickles me. Check out the 2014 Bee Dance.

Lastly, h/t to my friend (and former boss) Emily for this delicious video of Patrick Fugit singing, rock star hair and all. #scorpio #obsessed

Futures x10

From the band’s Instagram

The table 3/4 of the band ate dinner at.

Last Thursday night, H and I drove up to Ventura to see Jimmy Eat World play their Futures x10 tour opening show. It was a very hot day, and I’d had an incredibly stressful morning at work, so my mood was quite blah. But Jimmy Eat World is my favorite band, and they would be playing my favorite album, so I had hopes the afternoon would improve.

We found a primo parking spot and ate dinner at Anacapa Brewing Company. It was good, but not amazing.

As we walked up Main Street towards the Majestic Ventura Theater for the show, we walked RIGHT PAST Jim, Rick and Tom from the band while they sat at an outside table eating dinner!

I thought I was going to throw up.

I never bother famous people *ever* but this time I felt justified to stalk them. I just wanted a photo or an autograph, just to shake their hands as say “We love your music – please keep going”. So, H and I stood 50 feet away, watching them like total creeps, not wanting to interrupt (though maybe they shouldn’t sit at an OUTSIDE TABLE one block from the venue if they don’t want to be bothered).

As they got up to leave, I walked after them – they looped into the restaurant and into the back. Were they using the bathrooms or heading out a back exit? Arg. Basically, we missed them completely.

Serious disappointment.

As we stood in line to get inside the GA show, I watched as each band member walked alone, from different routes, right by crowds of people to get onto the tour bus parked in front of the venue. I think I was the only person who saw Jim walk the entire block. Fans were oblivious, staring at their cell phones or talking to each other. My heart skipped watching him, but I didn’t blow his cover. :sigh:

The show itself was good – they seemed a bit rusty, but it’s the first night of the month long tour. (See the entire setlist). The songs from Futures that really rock live still did (Pain, Work and Kill) and the ones they usually don’t play, I understand why. Polaris is seriously in my top 3 but it wasn’t as intimate live as listening to it on headphones. Drugs or Me was really great – I was dreading it b/c it’s so slow – but the new guitar player / background vocalist / keyboard player added so much with his vocals that this song flew.

They hit this amazing rockin’ out stride during Nothingwrong – it sounded amazing and they killed it then. I didn’t realize it till I was writing this, but their first encore included 3 songs from the Stay On My Side EP which came out right after Futures. Duh. It was smart for them to include them right after, a continuation of the catalogue. According to the setlist website, Over and Closer made their debut the other night (pretty cool to say we were there) and Disintegration hasn’t been played live since 2008. Hearing these songs live made me want to revisit the EP. Listening to it now as I write this.

(Also, fun fact which I some how just discovered: Heatmiser, which is a band Jimmy Eat World quotes in the lyrics of Kill: “like you’re favorite Heatmiser song goes”, had the Elliot Smith as their lead guitar and vocals guy. How did I not know this until now?)

We have tickets for the final show at Club Nokia next month. I’m excited to see them play the same show again. It’s awesome we’re seeing the first and last shows of the same tour.

This is the 6th time I’ve seen them live, the 3rd x10 show (Clarity and Bleed American happened over the past 4 years), and the first time I’ve seen them outside of Los Angeles county. We bought t-shirts at the merch table. I spotted them on the street and almost talked to them. And I sang along to every song.

It’s like I really almost am a super fan.

Piqued

This was our first full week of work and school since the semester began. We both had to work one night, so we weren’t home much. Carter still has a major case of fleas. I felt like the week flew by.

I planned a usual list of links, but then realized how many were of music. So here is your first all music Piqued. Let me know what you think, what you enjoy.

The band known as ∆ (alt j) has some pretty weird music – I’m digging Every Other Freckle.
Note: the video is hot, weird and not safe for work.

H has Sledgehammer on loop and shared the Dave Matthews Band version with me.

Watch Bon Iver live.

My friend Emily swears Hozier is AMAZING but it wasn’t until this song that I was like oooohhhh, I think I’m getting thisLike Real People Do.

Andrew McMahon has a new record coming out ::jumping up a down::
Fist pump to High Dive.

Also, this:
“I’ve been writing music most of my life. Songs have always been the place where I’ve sorted out the events of day. If you trace these songs back far enough they tell a story of where I’ve been and what I’ve seen along the way. Cecilia was written with the knowledge that my wife and I would soon meet our first child. With the hope of avoiding territory this type of song often treads, I tried to create a road map of the life I had lived leading up to that moment. One my daughter might look back on some day. A strange life of constant motion, spent traveling in the pursuit of music. A life I’ve nearly lost on more than one occasion and one which I am thankful for, now more than ever.” ~Andrew McMahon
Listen to Cecilia and the Satellite

To continue on the pop-punk break-your-heart music… Jimmy Eat World is MY FAVORITE BAND. They’re the only band I’ve ever been obsessed with the way other girls growing up wanted jump the Backstreet Boys. Jimmy Eat World is my band – they get me.

So there’s nothing more awesome then when I get to see them in person, which is about once a year since they’re based in AZ and are LA-darlings. They alternate between a new record tour and a 10 year anniversary tour, where they play the entirety of an old record live. I saw them at the El Rey for their CD release show for Big Casino, at Club Nokia for Clarity x10, the Wiltern for Bleed American x10 and most recently, a year ago on the 28th at the Palladium. They’ve announced they’re touring for Futures x10, which is MY FAVORITE RECORD by my favorite band – so we bought tickets to see them TWO TIMES: October 2nd in Ventura and November 2nd in Los Angeles.

I CAN NOT WAIT.

And if we’re continuing with some of my all-time-favorite artists, Ani Difranco has a new record dropping November 4th, Allergic To Water.

Last, but never least, Ryan Adams always kills it (I love Come Pick Me Up the mostest) and he just released a new self-titled record. Watch him rock out with “Gimme Something Good”

 

See all of my Piqued posts here.

Siren Songs

The first time I saw Hughie Stone Fish play live was on Valentine’s Day 2 years ago. To say I was blown away would be an understatement. His songs are just the kind you want to hear on Vday… after a hard break-up.

I am very picky in my love of songwriters. From Joni Mitchell to Ani Difranco, from Don Henley to Taylor Swift, from Garth Brooks to Death Cab for Cutie to Jimmy Eat World (ok, this last one’s more of a band crush), to so many people in between, it’s the voices of these songs that kill me. Some combination of words + melody that drive right to the heart of it.

Give me the honesty of your experience in this life. This is what I hear when I listen to Hughie’s songs.

I could give you a run down of the album song by song. Break things down note by note, like the groove in “Israel Song”, or how the guitar part in the title track “Siren Songs” echos the determination and guilt of the singer. How “Broken Homes” is in an odd meter, the storyteller singing “fallllllling… fassstttterrr” and you really do feel like you’re falling, because you’re missing.a.beat. It’s just… gone.

This is called prosody. When the structure of the rhythm / melody supports the meaning of the lyrics. This is something I learned in my own songwriting studies that are so far gone now. This is something HSF gets.

His honesty could almost make you uncomfortable, if you didn’t believe every word he sings – but you do, and so, you go along song to song, amazed at both the humor and the sadness a song can contain. Which is probably why I love them so – I live in the grey world of joy and sadness, of sarcasm and hurt, of craving emotional honesty.

But if you want the song that will just slay you, it’s “Benjamin”, about a father’s stark honesty about not being such a great father, unable to help his son. Holy hell. Makes me cry every time.

“If you leave us now
You’ll break your mother’s heart
I know I should’ve told you
I’ve wait for too long
Benjamin, I’m sorry, I did you wrong”

But that’s not the single, and so I can’t share that song with you here. But I hope you’ll check the record out today – you can start with the single below, “Siren Songs”, complete with stop-motion chalkboard video. Love it.

Update: you can listen to the whole record and ‘pay what you can’ via bandcamp. http://hughiestonefish.bandcamp.com/album/siren-songs

Pop Culture Much?

Well – hello again.

Technically, work’s been super quiet, and I’m taking advantage. BUT I’m really just stock-piling reserves for the craziness that is the end of January string of events. Not to mention most of 2014 being blocked out already. Found out a venue we usually use is booked (FML) so I’m searching for a new option. There’s a bit more drama there, but it’s a total waste of energy to bring it into this space.

I am loving my new iPhone because of the PicTapGo app (see photo above for example). The “lights on” filter basically gives you the look of more light on any photo, plus it tracks the filters you use most frequently. Like, I have a style. Go figure.

And speaking of style – check out this hotness: 5 Days of Dresses by Hell of High Fashion. Jess is the gal who styled me back in February (happy bday to myself) and I’ve been in love with my closet ever since. Gotta do a post soon on the new outfits I purchased a few weeks ago. All I am gonna say is YAY NAVY.

Been talk talk talking about ideas for this little space, my own career and magic in general… conversations with friends, colleagues and lots of cool people. Like the few coffee meetings with Max of Shmedia Media who wrote out a little plan-of-action for me to make on move. First of which involves getting a Pinterest account. Because I need another internet rabbit hole to dive down… but when a guy who knows social media say “You are the reason Pinterest exist” one shuts her mouth and creates an account. More TBD.

We’re almost done with Orange Is The New Black. It’s awesome. Go watch it. The End.

I finally connected my love of Chris Hardwick to the downloading of The Nerdist podcast and my head basically exploded. This podcast is the epitome of everything I care about: art, creating, pulling the curtain back, interviews, real conversations and pop culture (minus deep nerd culture).

Blasting music by Haim and Lucius‘ new record Wildewoman.

And I’m reading The Book Thief and going to see Catching Fire tomorrow with my sister – so if anyone ever says I’m not into pop-culture enough, please remind me to send them this post.

happy weekending.

 

 

 

 

Lately…

I received a new iPhone 5s and it’s fabulous. Especially the camera + apps. The latte pic above was taken with PicTapGo. Highly recommend.

We had a festive evening with some friends, carving pumpkins and drinking spiked cider. Love me some honey Jack. I went with the graphic and simple Pumpkin Pi (get it?! I am married to a math teacher). Unfortunately, the thing bloomed into a mess of mold after 4 days.

I cleaned (almost) the entire apartment by myself before my parents came to visit – with disc 1 of this DMB concert at Central Park blaring through the TV. I’ve avoided DMB for ~11years now due to major falling-outs around the time I cared about them. Music, and love, will do that to you.

The table cloth I purchased after Christmas last year made it’s debut, complete with tiny pumpkins. It’s finally feeling like Fall here.

My parents visited – which included a Jason Aldean concert, taking professional family portraits on the beach, eating more bread in 4 days than I eat in a normal month, a walk through Abbott Kinney and a visit to The Getty.

I applied for, and was able to process, my passport paperwork. Looking at that puppy arriving in the mail in T-6 weeks.

Now, where should we go?

The Great Gatsby

Forgot to include this in my recent obsessions last week, but OMG if I am not obsessed with the newest Great Gatsby movie. We saw it a few weeks ago, back when I wasn’t feeling so hot. Of course, the doomed love story didn’t help my mood.

The costumes, the set design, the acting and the music. I loved it all.

And there’s something so heartbreaking about Gatsby’s love, his obsession with Daisy, and his inability to let the past go.

I am a die-hard Leo DiCaprio fan, and am continually impressed with the roles he’s taken on recently. But this one, Gatsby, was a throw back to his Romeo and Juliet days. The unadulterated  naive and pristine love Gatsby has for Daisy… it’s devastating.

So I wanted to share this Lana Del Rey song from the soundtrack and the movie… because putting this on repeat gets me as close to that emo-teenage girl we’ve all been sometime in our past.

This article from the Village Voice blog – Lana Del Rey’s ‘Great Gatsby’ Greatness: Maybe Her Second Act Actually Doesn’t Suck – sums it up for me.

For good measure: did you see the Tiffany Jazz Age collection?! I even tried one on… eek!

At Home, in the Blues

 

 

 

And then we went to the Doheny Blues Festival.

The weather was warm, and the music was hot. We baked in the sun all day, H getting a ridiculous farmer’s tan. I slathered on the SPF 50. We lounged in beach chairs, relaxing with 10k other people. Luckily, H found us a spot right on the edge of the last section where people were setting chairs down. We ate BBQ, funnel cake, and tacos, and drank lots of beer and wine.

At one point, waiting for the Tedeschi Trucks Band to go on, I feel asleep on a blanket we put out. The sun was just sliding behind a tree, and the shade felt warm and cool at the same time. I was tipsy from wine, belly full of tacos, and I just felt this delicious feeling of…

Summer

and

Love

and

Peace

Blue music has my heart-strings more than other music seems to move me.

I discovered Susan Tedeschi when I was about 15 yrs old – a neighbor bought me her CD saying I sounded like her. Well, I was flattered, because this woman could sing. And I wish I’d kept hold of that thread through music college, because I think of how much more singing I could’ve done if I’d chased after this line of music.

Those memories bring me back to being 16 yrs old, at music camp, and so in love with life (and a boy). How at home I felt, surrounded by people playing music, holding hands with this guy who looked past my eyes and into my soul, and away from my family for the first time.

I remember being in a vocal workshop and us all going around improv-ing these blue lyrics over some changes. And I remember feeling this instance in my body, and letting it come out my mouth, almost too late where I’d missed my cue… but I hadn’t. And after that exercise, the assistant teacher came over and complimented me on my timing, on my voice.

I’d really had something.

But the next few years proved to be challenging, and music went off my map, or maybe I went off it’s. I remember a few years later, one teacher said she didn’t know if I “couldn’t hear the right notes, of if you just have terrible pitch”. Contradictory feedback, eh? And the second came at $1000+ / credit. (shaking my head – like wtf?)

Regardless, being back in the sun and grass, hearing those guitars come charging through the afternoon heat, and Susan’s voice flooding my ears – it felt good to be back there.

Wherever that is.