Allowing Myself

…to feel, to love, to be.

Tag: piqued

Piqued

Had a super productive week both at work and home because I am traveling a bunch in the next 2 weeks. By the time you read this, I’ll be in Denver visiting my friend Chelsea, where apparently it’s going to be a low of 14*. I’ve packed 3 sweaters and my puffy down “sleeping-bag” coat to keep me warm while we bike, eat, drink tea, and spend mucho quality time together.

Ah, the dark, dark nostalgia. Hey Arnold! characters all grown up.

This tweet.

And also my Twitter conversation with Yvette Nicole Brown where we chatted about the Serial podcast. She is my favorite guest on the Talking Dead (she has pages of notes about each episode).

OMG the Serial podcast. Hoping to write a longer post on this eventually, but I am loving the narrative form, the voices, the music. I don’t care so much about the who-done-it as much as the storytelling process in the series. The Slate Serial Spoiler Special is the podcast-about-the-podcast and a critical discussion about both the unfolding of the reporting and the way it’s being reported. So meta.

New moon in Sagittarius today – the questing sign.

I share Elizabeth Gilbert’s Facebook statuses (stati?) a few times a week. I love her updates, her words, her take on life.

We saw Interstellar last weekend (I liked it, was glad we saw it in the theater too) so of course I am drawn to stories about people’s experiences in space – An Astronaut Reveals What Life In Space Is Really Like.

On the last two nights of my final flight, I slept on the flight deck, my sleeping bag strapped beneath the overhead windows. The position of the shuttle put Earth in those windows, so when I woke up the whole world was out there in front of me—in that moment, just for me alone.

And cuz I’m not one to miss a list: The Top 10 Mistakes in Behaviour Change (and How to Avoid Them). My favorite is mistake #4 “Trying to Stop Old Behaviors Instead of Creating New Ones”. This def works for me. I like how he included further reading links.

And on that note – Can Absence Make The Mind Grow Fonder. I’ve found when I stop consuming something (purchasing clothes, drinking alcohol, eating Oreos, posting on Twitter etc) I don’t miss it. Yes, there’s the initial moment of going for the thing and realizing it’s not there (or I made a choice to avoid it) but then after even a few short days, it’s like, whatever. I do agree on the substitution part, which supports what I liked about mistake #4 in the above paragraph.

Have a great weekend xo

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Piqued

From last weekend’s cuddle-sesh

It was a short, 3-day work week and I loved every minute of it. One of the rewards of travel is that my normally aloof mutt becomes very interested in snuggling (see above).

Now on to the links:

Happy Writer Mama wrote up An Introvert’s Guide To Retreats (With People) but I’d say it’s a great list to keep handy for any situation where you have to meet a lot of new people, especially people you want to be hanging out with.

Guuyyyyyssss, I love post-apocalyptic stories + Walking Dead zombies and Margaret Atwood is one of my favorite authors, so it’s only natural that I share her short how to survive a zombie apocalypse appearance on BuzzFeed.

Tom Hanks is obsessed with typewriters. The cooler thing? I’ve gotten to see some of them because of my cool music industry-related job. Now if only he’d been working the day I was at his office… This NPR Book News link also covers Ann Patchett’s comma correction and Lena Dunham’s rage spiral. Obvi.

20 Animals with Majestic Hair. My sister texted me this link and I actually laughed out loud, multiple times. I feel like at least half of these animals’ internal dialogue is just “FML”.

For a happy Justine, sleep is the 2nd priority, coming in right below food, so it’s no surprise to me that sleep-deprived bees are not able to give their little waggle directions as accurately as their well-rested counterparts. (I wish this article was longer. I love bees.)

My friend T sent me this link about how introverts interact differently with the world, including an ah-ha moment for WHY I SIT NEAR EXITS. “When surrounded by people, they (introverts) locate themselves close to an exit…Whether it be by an exit, at the back of a concert hall, or an aisle row on an airplane, they avoid being surrounded by people on all sides”.

New motto for life: avoid people on all sides.

And random share here, but @danlongo ‘s tweets are hilarious. We’re like, almost real internet friends b/c he’s friends with my actual internet friend Ciara.

And that’s that. Happy weekending xo

Piqued

Los Angeles’ best small venues to catch music in.

Jill on trusting in basic goodness:

I am already whole, all of us are — this is basic goodness. I am not a problem to be fixed, or a project to take on, and neither are you, nor anyone else. You are not — no matter what advertising, religion, culture, or that little meanie with sharp teeth that lives in the dark might say – you are not basically bad, you are not unworthy or unlovable.

Lindsey on Parenting as an introvert / Parenting as an extrovert – knowing that my introversion affected the dynamic within my nuclear family growing up, and is something I navigate often within my relationship with my sister now as adults, I am keenly aware this will continue to be part of who I am as a mother:

My introversion and natural shyness surely means many things for my children, good and bad. I worry that the bad outweighs the good, that my lack of outgoingness and my struggle to include other people in our life sacrifices something important for them. All I can do, though, is be the best version of who I know I am. All I can do is swear that I will keep trying to open up—myself, our home, and our family.

The Barefoot Contessa is every piece of Long Island I wish my life could be, wrapped in a clean and calm cooking show. So naturally, I found this drinking game to be hilarious.

Ani Difranco is one of my creative heroes. Reading this interview was like sinking back into my 15 year old self, except that now Difranco is speaking about babies on top of feminism and songwriting. We’ve both come a long way.

Difranco talking about her new album “Allergic To Water” :

Yeah, I mean that sounds like a cool way of interpreting it. I guess my particular way would be that everything that is worthwhile and in fact necessary, what sustains you and gives you life, is also painful. And often the most important things are the most painful. I think the reason I chose that song to title the whole record is because that feeling, I noticed, comes up a lot in the record. It was just that kind of year for me, or couple years.

A tad late, but I am becoming more and more a person who wants to have a spiritual Halloween (or New Years or Valentine’s Day) and be much less about drinking beers in bars. Reading more of thenuminous.net may be the right way in.

My obsession with Jimmy Eat World continues (saw them perform again last week, blog post coming). And if you have an obsession, the Internet is right there with you, helping you along. This candid interview with Jim Adkins is delightful, minus Matt Pinfield’s aggressive chatter.

Piqued

 

It was a quiet week – always grateful for that. I slept really well despite intense dreams, the cooler temps and darker mornings made for sleeping in some. We ate dinners at home, made it to the climbing gym and I got a haircut.

I feel like I did a really good job resting up before an overnight camping trip this weekend, 2nd Jimmy Eat World show in a month on Sunday plus traveling for work this coming week. I’m learning that I don’t just need recovery time after highly intense situations but I can build in “topping off” time to make sure my reserves are at their fullest before going into intense or tiring situations.

And now, a few links…

Kyla Roma is just a gem on her site. This post How I Live (Mostly Happily!) with Depression & Generalized Anxiety Disorder is not only an eye-opener about her experience, but also has a ton of links to resources and apps (!!). She writes “I had no idea how much of what I experienced daily wasn’t normal (and was optional!)” She makes the point that we only know the world as we know it, and if we’ve always felt a certain way, how can we know that that way is normal? More importantly, depression can make you forget you ever felt otherwise and obliterate you in its passing. It’s a good read.

“The process of making these books is good for you to help you process each season, appreciate it, and remember the details while also creating something to look back on in the future.” You may not know how much I love the idea of scrapbooking, but this list 10 Reasons To Give Scrapbooking A Chance hits on all the points of why I do. I just want to do it more and more. Journaling, blogging, photographing and scrapbooking. Tell all the stories!

I am continuing to learn more and more about introversion and being highly sensitive. I am not sure this applies to me for business meetings When Introverts Should Avoid Coffee, but in general, I am very sensitive to caffeine. Last weekend I had a mocha and was so wired I couldn’t think straight. Overall, I’ve switched back to tea, sip one latte a week (more for the comfort than caffeine) and avoid straight coffee entirely. Decaf doesn’t seem to matter, but the quality of the coffee does.

I linked to Elise’s blog before. Most recently she blogged her business story (you can read the entire thing here). In the last post, she spoke about her newest product idea, the BIG IDEA, the Get To Work Book. Crazy thing is, it isn’t even in production yet, and she won’t launch till July 2015. Being a paper / planner / Type-A / listmaker I am excited for the product, but more so, I am sooooo pumped she is sharing the process and behind-the-scenes of launching this product. #celebrationemoji

Years ago I wrote about stillness, and how I realized that it was never going to arrive, but instead be something I needed to actively seek amidst the activity of my full life. I think all the time – daily, at least – of TS’s Eliot’s lines from Four Quartets, We must be still and still moving. Being still in the middle of the busy-ness, that’s the goal, at least for me.  Finding ways to breathe and to be here, mostly because without doing that I miss my life.  And as I remind myself, over and over again, I chose this, this manifold set of responsibilities and identities which unfurl, shimmering, piling upon each other, beautiful and daunting at the same time.

The Slipstream of Life. Lindsey continues to break my heart and take my breath away.

Don’t forget to set your clock to “fall back” at 2am Sunday! Bye daylight savings time.

For the Halloween spirit, every year, Cathy Zielske wears a bee costume, and recently posts a video of her dancing as said bee. While the video is funny, the fact that she wears the same costume every year for 24 years is what tickles me. Check out the 2014 Bee Dance.

Lastly, h/t to my friend (and former boss) Emily for this delicious video of Patrick Fugit singing, rock star hair and all. #scorpio #obsessed

Piqued

Twas a good week, finally. Yay.

Steph was back in town – we walked the neighborhood, watched Elizabeth Gilbert on Super Soul Sunday (highly recommend) and took selfies with Carter Cash.

Balance to the Universe restored.

I booked a flight, pretty much on a whim, to visit my friend Chelsea in Denver. Hi Chels!

We still have absolutely ZERO plans for Halloween. Maybe b/c we have to be up at 6am the day after.

And I’m getting some quality home alone time while H is at a math conference with his best friend.

Here are a few links for you this weekend:

7 Strange Questions That Help Your Find Your Life Purpose. While I’m so over the self-help culture and how it’s exploded into a black hole of lists to make you feel bad about how you’re living your life, these questions are funny and thought-provoking. Enjoy.

Found Shoestring Adventures (total weekend warrior porn) because they interviewed on of my fav bloggers ever Jillian Lukiski. She’s a metalsmith, blogger and photographer who lives and breathes nature, takes amazing photos and writes like a banshee.

“I make what I make because I live in the interior West and this space has carved my spirit and my life. This is the land I know by heart. These are the mountains I hike and run and ski. These are the trees I know by name. These are the wild animals I watch and cherish and hunt and fish and witness and take into my own life cycle on a daily basis.”

My college roommate and I knew this, but coloring is soooooo relaxing. I can just smell the crayons now.

Some straight office/productivity advice: don’t answer emails that lack questions.

And a little combo of hippy and good advice – do it anyway.

“At one point, she (Cheryl Strayed) was talking about uncertainty, about how to keep going when you don’t know how, when you aren’t sure of the outcome, about how to take that step when the deck is stacked against you: she said that you have to say a prayer to the god of doing it anyway.  You have to take a deep breath and go for it even though you have no idea how it will all turn out.  You have to find that teeny bit of faith so that you can take the very next step.”

I usually don’t link to funny videos, but H and I couldn’t stop laughing at this kid:

 

Piqued

As you know, I launched 30 Days of Dresses this week. Woo! Thanks for all of your comments 🙂

I loved this Complete Guide To Structuring Your Ideal Work Day, especially the idea of brushing your teeth at 2:30pm. While I’m continuously trying to find the right daily and weekly routines that support my energy levels and introversion, this seemed like a great guide for any office worker bees.

Abby Kerr, who ran the INFJ business class I loved (it’s coming back!), has a real knack for linking to amazing posts. Follow her on Twitter.

Abby shared Allie’s post on the care and feeding of new moms. A few of my friends are new(ish) mom and I admit, I had no idea how to help them. And because I love offering help, supporting people and receiving help myself when I’m down in the shit-time of any life change, I felt completely useless as friends to these women. This post will be my reference material now.

Back to introvert’s dreams, here’s a list of things only people who love spending time alone will understand (I think my sister gets credit for texting me this). This is seriously alone-time indulgences and I could spend a month just going through a challenge checking items off this list.

I am loving the National Geographic Your Shot Blog. Animals, nature, culture and gorgeous pics? I’m in.

To follow that up, living off the grid / what people miss about living in the wilderness. This pretty much sums up my broken heart after Alaska.

And finally, Pink Ronnie has reevaluated her blogging / storytelling, shuttered her Pink Ronnie blog and launched The Shoemakers Daughter (tho today the link isn’t working 😦 ) I love her style, story-telling and photography. I would love to take a class with her in person and am book-marking her Life Captured online courses.

That’s it for this weekend. Enjoy xo

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Piqued

This was our first full week of work and school since the semester began. We both had to work one night, so we weren’t home much. Carter still has a major case of fleas. I felt like the week flew by.

I planned a usual list of links, but then realized how many were of music. So here is your first all music Piqued. Let me know what you think, what you enjoy.

The band known as ∆ (alt j) has some pretty weird music – I’m digging Every Other Freckle.
Note: the video is hot, weird and not safe for work.

H has Sledgehammer on loop and shared the Dave Matthews Band version with me.

Watch Bon Iver live.

My friend Emily swears Hozier is AMAZING but it wasn’t until this song that I was like oooohhhh, I think I’m getting thisLike Real People Do.

Andrew McMahon has a new record coming out ::jumping up a down::
Fist pump to High Dive.

Also, this:
“I’ve been writing music most of my life. Songs have always been the place where I’ve sorted out the events of day. If you trace these songs back far enough they tell a story of where I’ve been and what I’ve seen along the way. Cecilia was written with the knowledge that my wife and I would soon meet our first child. With the hope of avoiding territory this type of song often treads, I tried to create a road map of the life I had lived leading up to that moment. One my daughter might look back on some day. A strange life of constant motion, spent traveling in the pursuit of music. A life I’ve nearly lost on more than one occasion and one which I am thankful for, now more than ever.” ~Andrew McMahon
Listen to Cecilia and the Satellite

To continue on the pop-punk break-your-heart music… Jimmy Eat World is MY FAVORITE BAND. They’re the only band I’ve ever been obsessed with the way other girls growing up wanted jump the Backstreet Boys. Jimmy Eat World is my band – they get me.

So there’s nothing more awesome then when I get to see them in person, which is about once a year since they’re based in AZ and are LA-darlings. They alternate between a new record tour and a 10 year anniversary tour, where they play the entirety of an old record live. I saw them at the El Rey for their CD release show for Big Casino, at Club Nokia for Clarity x10, the Wiltern for Bleed American x10 and most recently, a year ago on the 28th at the Palladium. They’ve announced they’re touring for Futures x10, which is MY FAVORITE RECORD by my favorite band – so we bought tickets to see them TWO TIMES: October 2nd in Ventura and November 2nd in Los Angeles.

I CAN NOT WAIT.

And if we’re continuing with some of my all-time-favorite artists, Ani Difranco has a new record dropping November 4th, Allergic To Water.

Last, but never least, Ryan Adams always kills it (I love Come Pick Me Up the mostest) and he just released a new self-titled record. Watch him rock out with “Gimme Something Good”

 

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Piqued

It was back from Alaska and back-to-school around here this week. Carter was the most disappointed, since H and I were both busy and not at home as much (see his moping above). We have a pretty quiet weekend ahead of us. I am hoping to work on my travel journal and write a few more stories from our trip. We have lunch with friends and need to catch up on some sleep too.

Alaska seemed to shift things inside me, and it has me thinking about storytelling and prioritizing my creative craft. This post on Design For Mankind got me thinking:

I think about this all the time, about the kind of picture I’m carving. Is it worth it? Is it profound enough to exist in my mountain for future generations to view and question and fill in the blanks about the kind of people we were? – Blogging, Now

“Again and again, your brain will be an asshole naysayer.” Yes, this from The Brand Camp blog. And she links to a Good Life Project interview with Seth Godin, which I will be watching while I eat my own drippy eggs and toast.

After reading this Medium post, I’m seriously considering quitting the Facebook “Like” button.

This grateful, and snarky, tour of a kitchen was pretty spot on:

In terms of parenting, marriage, home, clothes – I will not be a slave to the Tyranny of Trend any longer. I am almost 40 years old and no catalog is the Boss of Me anymore. I am free. I am not bound to spend my precious days on Earth trying to keep up with the Joneses- because the Joneses are really just a bunch of folks in conference rooms changing “trends” rapidly to create fake monthly emergencies for us. OH NO! NOW IT’S A SUBWAY TILE BACKSPLASH WE NEED!  No, thank you. Life offers plenty of REAL emergencies to handle, thank you very much.

My friend Steve has a Thank You practice, and I am thoroughly enjoying his posts. So, thank you to him for sharing his thank yous.

And after being mostly off-the-grid for the 11 days of vacation, I am continuing that with keeping my phone on “do not disturb” and staying off social media this week. Will let you know how that ends up feeling.

Enjoy your weekending peeps xo

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Looking for more to read? Here’s the full list of Piqued posts.

Piqued

This week was rough. Some combination of exhaustion + pms + work events left me napping almost every afternoon, relying on friends, and in tears a few of the days. (Yes, even though I don’t feel like I’m being punched anymore, I still have bad days). Still, I stumbled upon some cool, share-worthy items out in the internets, and I post them below for your reading pleasure.

Happy solstice!

Each body mitten is hand-knitted by celibate Virgos using hypo-allergenic squirrel wool inter-woven with strands of unicorn hair that were marinated in lavender oil infused with emerald powder.

Hahaha. So funny.

You may know Mercury is retrograde (and if you have felt completely crazy the past 2+ weeks, this could be why). The Mercury Retrograde Body Mitten could be just the answer! This tongue-in-cheek post went viral and the author writes a response to its popularity here – Smitten By The Mitten.

I don’t watch The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon but H found the Ragtime Gals, Jimmy’s barbershop quartet segments (I know, I know. I’m always late to the barbershop quartet parties) and I about died laughing. I love that Fallon loves music and brings it into so much of his comedy. Watch him sing Talk Dirty To Me with Kevin Spacey. His show also features these epic lip-syncing battles – see Emma Stone win here.

I love the Internet, and this link is exactly why – Know Your Meme, y’know, just in case you didn’t.

There’s this literary map to end all literary maps. And a guide to Literary L.A.

Our favorite diner, Pepy’s Galley, is closing. ::hysterically crying emoji:: They’re being kicked out by new building owners who plan to renovate the attached bowling alley – but all our neighborhood sees is the loss of a 40 year old west LA landmark. The (breakfast) food is delish, it’s the best coffee I’ve ever had, the staff is speedy and it’s cash only. H and I love to eat at the bar and watch the bustle of the back counter… it’s part of our weekending, where we usually get into our longest conversation-sans-electronics in a week. While there are petitions to save or relocate the restaurant, it doesn’t look good.

I listened to The Lively Show podcast featuring Esme Wang while I walked 3m around Boston last week. I love Esme’s idea of radical sincerity, and even though I read her book, it wasn’t until I heard her speak about it on the podcast that I truly understood what she meant. Radical sincerity is NOT radical honesty, but instead “a conversation about authenticity and vulnerability”. Take a listen and/or peruse around her site – it’s gorgeous & full of elegant, powerful writing.

And, even though I am sooooooo not following the World Cup, this longer read by my Stef’s boyfriend, Carlos Foglia, delighted me. My Father is My Most Unforgettable World Cup Memory.

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Piqued

Currently, I’m in Boston for work – busy busy busy – and very much thrown off from my creative self. Haven’t written morning pages in a few days now, had at least one glass of wine per night, and just came off a crazy work day where I’ve been up almost 24hrs.

But I remembered last week I started what I hope is a weekly post called Piqued, in which I share stuff I’m reading online / obsessed with… and a picture of Carter, because CARTER. This pic is from a run we took last Saturday afternoon in which I was too tired and he was too hot – he found a shady spot and laid down, planning not to move for a while. We were still a 1/2 mile from home. :sigh:

Here is what’s up this week:

TomBoatesEverybody is a college friend, who is marrying one of my best friends. He DJ’d my wedding and creates these brilliant mash-ups. I may be his biggest fan, but I don’t know how that works, since I’ve never been a fan of a DJ. He tweeted this mash-up this week and I am obsessed: Turn Fancy For What. Also check out Ludacris.

On the plane ride from LAX to Boston, I listened to this Time And Attention talk by Merlin Mann. It’s probably the second time I’ve listened to it, but it always gives me new things to think about in relationship to how I spend my time, where I focus my attention and if I’m putting energy into solving the right problems.

H and I just binged on three seasons of Game of Thrones (no spoilers!) and it’s invaded our vernacular. We thoroughly enjoy the character of Tyrion Lannister, joke about wanting a direwolf, and I randomly quote the show, mostly by saying “You know nothing Jon Snow”. I have yet to read the books or watch the current season, but this interactive map that accounts for spoilers is pretty fucking cool.

I bought this book, Co-Active Coaching (4th edition), and it’s already giving me new language to articulate the intuitive hits I receive from the world around me. I feel drawn to life coaching and am exploring doing it more – understanding what it really means to coach people and if this could become another job.

And to celebrate – H just had his last day of school & began summer school, where he’s interning as a house principal. Happy summer!