Allowing Myself

…to feel, to love, to be.

Tag: swimming

9 of 52: Year of Ocean

 

 

I thought the other day how, even though LA doesn’t really have seasons, I do. And so it seems appropriate I haven’t been to the beach much or that things have felt a tad internal rather than external for the past five and a half months. And that I haven’t felt interested in this project until yesterday morning, when I woke up with a strong urge to go swim in the ocean.

Saturday night we went to a clothing swap / poker night and didn’t get home until the wee hours of Sunday morning. I woke up after 4 hours of sleep with a slight headache and major hankering to swim. My schedule was double-booked for the afternoon (a birthday party for Steph & a BBQ with my sis) but I had just enough time to go for a run & swim down at Venice Beach (like I did the first week of January).

I ran from my parking spot, up the beach path – past vendors, homeless backpackers, puppies on leashes, people with expensive video equipment, skateboarders and incense clouds – to somewhere in Santa Monica. I felt like I could’ve gone forever, but I was on a time crunch.

Along the area where I got onto the path, I walked out on the sand, asked a young girl if she’d watch my stuff, Then, I walked straight into the ocean. It felt glorious.

The Pacific feels so much more powerful than the Atlantic ever did when I was growing up – so I don’t go in past my waist. But I swam a bit, ducked under a few waves, submerged my body.

It was exactly what I needed. Glad I listened to that small voice telling me to go.

So, yes – the Year of Ocean project is back! It may have been too ambitious to think I could go to the ocean & come up with new content here weekly, but I’m OK with this being as many visits as I can get… if I don’t hit 52 before 2015 or it takes me 2 years, it’ll still be a fun project.

*See all of my Year of Ocean

2 of 52, Year of Ocean

“Been so long since I’ve seen the ocean… guess I should” 
Counting Crows

Wasn’t in a great mood when I woke up. Moon in Pisces, bad dreams, last day of vacation. Blank mind, but anxiety. How does that happen?

Took myself down to the beach path for a 2m run alone. H had Carter. I decided to run super fast, see how quickly I could run a mile. Averaged under 10min/mile which is pretty awesome for me.

On my way back I walked out to the waves… and dolphins. Jumping in the breaks, sliding through the water, playing with the birds. As I watched them, I had an inkling, a tiny voice say: go in.

I haven’t really swam in the ocean since I was rescued by a life guard a few summers ago (that’s a story for a different time). But I know that Lisa Field-Elliot swims during the cold months and there was already a woman walking hip-deep in the tide, and those two surfers waiting patiently…

So I pulled my top off and placed my phone and keys in my hat and waded in.

It wasn’t as cold as I expected. In fact, it felt glorious. The water sucked and cradled my legs, the sounds hummed in my ears, the shock of wind against my wet skin gave me goose-bumps, and the dolphins continued to jump and play in the distance.

“How beautiful” I kept saying to myself.

My mind cleared, my body calmed, my soul was light.

It was exactly what I needed even though I didn’t know it.

After the dolphins moved on, I dunked my body twice in the sandy, churning water (though I couldn’t bring myself to put my head under – it wasn’t that warm). I let the waves push me back onto shore and walked back to my things, honoring the moon in Pisces, my one little word flow and myself.

**See all of my Year of Ocean

~written January 5th 2014